Finding the sound of your voice
November 7, 2011 by Admin · Leave a Comment
Everybody has a musical instrument and it doesn’t cost a thing. It is your voice. Nothing on earth matches it for range, power, variety, and expressiveness. You undoubtedly use it for speaking, but are you singing? You should be. We live in a sonorous universe, all matter vibrates, and all creatures sing their songs. How about you?
All god’s creatures got a place in the choir
Some sing low and some sing higher
Some sing out loud on the telephone wire
Some just clap their hands or paws or anything they’ve got nowListen to the bass it’s the one at the bottom
Where the bullfrog croaks and the hippopotamus
Moans and groans in the big tattoo
And the old cow just goes “moo”
The dogs and the cats they take up the middle
Where the honey bee hums and the cricket fiddles
The donkey brays and the pony neighs
And the old grey badger sighs ohI have heard your story that you cannot carry a tune, how the mean teacher asked you to be silent during choral singing. But I have not heard that you have spent any time seriously learning how to match notes, produce tones or tap out a rhythm. Yes, music making certainly comes easily to many of us and there are some that must seek it out. Perhaps you need to start with some simple dance steps to sense the rhythms. Or you hum along with the church choir. Imitate the bird song you hear in your garden. Or you rock your infant daughter with your best version of “My Girl”.
When all else fails there are professional voice teachers that can help you get started.
Whatever it costs you, go for it. Music making is your birthright. No one can sing your song but you. Even if you are the old grey badger that just sighs, ‘oh’. Do it. The universe will be the better for it.
If you want to learn more about how Dr. Fleming can help you improve your communication skills, please call her at telephone 415.391.9179 or send her an email at [email protected]
Carol Fleming, Ph.D., is the author of “It’s the Way You Say It”! Becoming Articulate, Well-spoken and Clear. A comprehensive guide to vocal development and improvement of communication skills.
The advantages of a sexy voice
September 27, 2011 by Admin · Leave a Comment
Let’s say you are the biggest bullfrog in the pond. .. Because you are the largest frog your voice (croak, mating call) will have a lower pitch than that of the other males. You will croak to let the lady frogs know where you are and they will be driven mad with desire by the sound of your deep froggy voice. The lady frogs will make their way to you, for clearly, you are the alpha male in this pond.
BUT the other male frogs who have the less compelling voice, know about the drawing power of this lower voice and use it to their own advantage. They position themselves around the Big Frog and lie in wait for the ladies who are approaching him. They nab a passing female and try to become a parent.
While this approach probably does not provide useful guidance for the gentlemen reading this blog, it does confirm that the lower voice in the male has certain advantages. If you examine the relative pitch levels of the parent and the infant in any species, you will find that the parent has the lower voice. Now imagine the voices of the predator and the prey. Same difference. The lower voice communicates size, power and, maturity. Ladies do find this to be sexy.
If you want to develop a sexy voice, please send an email to [email protected]
The Ancient Technology of Talking - Story from my friend in Egypt
February 12, 2011 by Admin · Leave a Comment
I received an email from Egypt this Thursday from my old friend Essam; he got me thinking about the robust and timeless importance of face-to-face conversation. He reported:
“One of the biggest blunders committed so far by the Egyptian regime in its current crisis was the decision to shut down the Internet service and Mobile service all over the country on Thursday night before the ‘Friday of Anger’. By doing this, the smart decision makers thought they would isolate the demonstrators and prevent them from communicating with each other, thus reducing the number of people who would show up on Friday at the el-Tahrir square and elsewhere in the country. Based on this naïve assumption, the former minister of the interior, el-Adly, expected a maximum of two thousand demonstrators
When people were cut off from the rest of the world on Thursday night they started going out to the streets to find out what was going on, they started searching for their friends and relatives to inquire about their well being. They talked to each other face to face and agreed to be there all day on Friday. Suddenly tens of thousands showed up on Friday, instead of the two thousand the brutal el-Adly was prepared for.”
When someone pulls the plug on our electronic devices, we can always use the ancient technology of talking to each other. It is the part of the Basic Guarantee that comes with being human. (Even with the plug in, the Egyptian people have only a 40% literacy rate.) For this to truly be the Egyptian People’s revolution, they all must be able to speak out together.
In effect, he gave them their voice.
Carol Fleming, Ph.D., is the author of “It’s the Way You Say It”! Becoming Articulate, Well-spoken and Clear. A comprehensive guide to vocal development and improvement of communication skills. For people who want to make their speaking more impressive and find their voice. She can be contacted at telephone 415.391.9179 or send her an email at [email protected]
Do You Need a Personal Communication Coach?
July 28, 2010 by Admin · Leave a Comment
Suppose there is something about the way you talk that really irritates people. How would you know? Without an objective, knowledgeable ear you will only know what you intend to say, not what is actually heard by others. Here are some of the problems you would run into:
1. It will seem to you that any problem in communication is always the fault of the other guys.
2. People will be reluctant to tell you, mostly because it would be both very rude and socially dangerous.
3. Very few people will know how to identify exactly what you are doing that is the problem. It does take expertise in verbal communication.
This is where a Personal Communication Coach would be immensely valuable to you. The relationship is confidential, professional and effective. The coach will support, instruct and sharpen the focus so that you gain maximum achievement for your effort. Yes, it cost money. But, yes, it works to put you in control of the sound of your voice.
“A Coach is someone who makes you do what you don’t want to do, has you see what you don’t want to see, so you can be everything you always wanted to be.” Tom Landry
You don’t know what you don’t know. Your personal coach helps you understand your blind side. I’m talking about the impression you make by the way you speak. Can you think of a better investment of your time and money?
Frodo: I wish the ring had never come to me. I wish none of this had happened.
Response: So do all who live to see such times, but that is not for them to decide. All you have to decide is what to do with the time that is given to you.
If you want to learn more about how Dr. Fleming can help you improve your communication skills, please call her at telephone 415.391.9179 or send her an email at [email protected]
Carol Fleming, Ph.D., is the author of “It’s the Way You Say It”: Becoming Articulate, Well-spoken and Clear. A comprehensive guide to vocal development and improvement of communication skills.
How to make the most of your voice
June 9, 2010 by Admin · Leave a Comment
Your voice is the carrier of more than information. It is your personality, your health and identity, your song. Like your breathing, it is so important to your life that you can practically forget about it and get away with it. Your body is quite expert in dealing with both breath and voice.
But, you could do more with your voice if you wanted to.
1. You could protect your voice from injury. Especially if you are a person who uses their voice for a living, like a teacher or a salesperson, and you want to take voice care seriously. But any person who values their voice must pay attention to these rules:
- Do not smoke. Period
- Notice persistent fatigue, soreness or hoarseness and take it to a physician (ENT). Don’t be stupid: don’t wait.
- Vocal abuse is real and can hurt you. Watch out for yelling, talking loudly for long periods and prolonged throat tension.
2. You should become mindful of the voice in all spoken communication. Become aware of the contribution of tonal support, melody and appropriate volume (loudness) to all spoken language and notice how much this tonal element contributes to the meaningfulness of language. Some people reduce the amount of change and variety in their voice to reduce expression of their emotion. This is usually a poor exchange. We need the music of the human voice to truly understand each other.
3. You would develop your voice as an art form. Certainly singing is at the top of that list, but don’t overlook oral reading, poetry and drama. Your voice is an instrument that you can learn to develop, master and enjoy for the rest of your life. There are teachers and opportunities around you. Look for them. You live in a sonorous universe. Add your voice to the chorus.
If you want to learn more about how Dr. Fleming can help you improve your communication skills, please call her at telephone 415.391.9179 or send her an email at [email protected].
Carol Fleming, Ph.D., is the author of “It’s the Way You Say It”! Becoming Articulate, Well-spoken and Clear. A comprehensive guide to vocal development and improvement of communication skills. For people who want to make their speaking more impressive.
Breathing RIGHT
May 17, 2010 by Admin · Leave a Comment
Let’s say you are trying to improve your voice and someone tells you to “Take a nice deep breath of air”. Do you vigorously elevate your shoulders and audibly inhale? If the answer is ‘yes”, then you are breathing WRONG.
You have just ACTED OUT, “I am breathing” with visual and sound effects, throwing way too much tension and effort into what should be the most natural and easy of activities. And you have been taught this wrong way by a number of instrument teachers, exercise coaches and yoga instructors.
Get in touch with natural breathing
Your first step is to stop unnecessary tension and get back to what comes naturally to the human body. Just follow these steps:
- Stand in front of a mirror so you can check your shoulder and mid-section movements.
- Allow your arms to hang naturally and your shoulders to be completely relaxed; they are NOT going to be involved in this exercise.
- When you inhale (take air in), imagine that you are breathing through your belly button, with the movement of expansion only at your belt line (mid-section).
- Because you are relaxing your air passages, There Are No Sound Effects. Use your mouth or your nasal passages, I don’t care. Just keep it silent.
- Don’t make yourself breathe: Let yourself breathe. Think of allowing the midsection of your trunk to expand; there should be NO effort involved, no on-purpose contraction of muscle. There is a large muscle inside your body called the diaphragm that is doing the work of enlarging the chest by moving downward. You’ve heard of ‘breathing from the diaphragm”? That’s what we’re talking about.
See the lady on her back at the top of the page? She is feeling the movement of her belly consequent to diaphragmatic action. If you are unsure about this issue, I recommend you get on the floor right now and put your hand on your belly to just feel the relaxed breathing movement. Pant like a dog to feel it exaggerated.
Is there time when that heaving of the upper chest and shoulders is appropriate? (Remember the scolding in the first paragraph?) Yes, in emergency conditions such as:
- Getting ready to swim the length of the pool underwater
- Running from a mugger
- Preparing to sing high C for 6 measures
Now, tell yourself to take a nice, deep breath and watch what you do. Remind yourself to relax the shoulders and let the diaphragm do the work.
If you want to learn more about how Dr. Fleming can help you improve your communication skills, please call her at telephone 415.391.9179 or send her an email at [email protected]
Carol Fleming, Ph.D., is the author of “It’s the Way You Say It”! Becoming Articulate, Well-spoken and Clear. A comprehensive guide to vocal development and improvement of communication skills. For people who want to make their speaking more impressive.
*Belly breathing illustration. Copyright 2004 by Dennis Lewis. Reprinted from Free Your Breath, Free Your Life, by Dennis Lewis (Shambhala, 2004) with the permission of the author. You can learn more about him and read his essays on his blog at http://www.dennislewisblog.com. His website is http://www.dennislewis.org
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