How to chat off-line (i.e. small talk)

A few weeks ago I received the following email:

“Carol, our techie group could use some help on how to chat offline. It would be great if you could relate this to how you present your online business to get attention while networking offline and online to show your an authority on a topic to get people to want to talk about you to get buzz and links back to your website.”

I admit this email gave me pause. I think he’s asking how (1) to talk to people and (2) develop business. If I’m wrong about this, please let me know.

Business development is clearly his primary goal but it’s that ‘talking with people” piece that I see as paramount. People do business with people they know and like and trust. We are all using updated technology in our business, but it can prevent us from developing communication skills.

1. You have to start with the relationship development (chat offline and establish trust and credibility) part before you can get to the business development part. Learn to say, ‘How are you?” before you say, “Buy my pots and pans”.

2. You have to learn how to talk with people about small things; common, everyday things –yes, like the weather- and its sole purpose is to give relationships a chance to develop and for genuine conversational topics to be discovered.

Mastery of this ability to create trusting relationships with people in both personal and business situations is something that all successful people have in common.

We don’t spend enough time thinking about the “know…and like…and trust” part when we are preoccupied with the sell motive.

Who do you do business with? Strangers from the yellow pages or someone you’ve have had a chance to meet face-to-face, exchange some words, smiles and a handshake?

The importance of small talk

Small talk is frequently undervalued and dismissed with the result that you never get good at it. I am urging an attitude adjustment here and I am telling you that it is possible to get really good at this.

Start by making it a priority to find a way to be interested and appreciative of other people FIRST before you try to sell your pots and pans. There are far more pots and pans out there than there are people you know and like and trust.

How to move from small talk to the elevator pitch

OK, I know some of you are eager to know how to move from “the weather” to the elevator pitch. Here you go:

You: Boy! It’s really pouring out there, isn’t it?

Other person: It sure is. And I’ve got a leak in my living room that I’m worried about right now.

You: You might need a pot to catch the water from the leak. I happen to carry a line of pots that might fit your need ……

To learn how to chat offline or master small talk, contact Dr. Carol Fleming at [email protected] or visit www.speechtraining.com